Impossible to Please

Have you ever felt faithless? That you are struggling to have faith with circumstances, wishing your faith was stronger because you know who God is? I am right there beside you.

Lately, I have read either in the Bible or in a book I’m studying for a discipleship group or even in a lesson in Sunday school about faith but not nearly faith but also the amazing love God has for us despite ourselves or struggles. Hebrews 11:6 clearly says it is impossible to please God without faith. Which you’re probably thinking, “Rhonda, how is that encouraging?” The encouraging part is that as you continue reading chapter 11, it tells about people from the Old Testament to the New Testament like you and me, who mess up, and yes, even struggle with their faith. Yet, God in His awesomeness used that little faith they did have in Him and did extraordinary things.

The one who struck me the most was Gideon. I read Hebrews 11 last Thursday, and then on Saturday, in my devos, I was reading in Judges and read about Gideon. Gideon struggled with fear, but despite his fear, he had faith, no matter how small it was, he had it, and God brought down Israel’s enemy through Gideon. When I was reading it, I was thinking about Hebrews 11, and how Gideon was used as an example of someone who had faith in God and how God used him. It reminded me of how in the Gospels, Jesus says that if we have faith like a mustard seed, you can move a mountain. God knows that we will struggle through this life. There will be times of doubt wondering what the Lord is doing or what His plan is or when He will reveal to us what the next step will look us, but He assures us that despite our fears and doubts, remember Christ’s love for us…cling to the faith in the One who gave up Himself for us-incomprehensible love…and no matter how small the faith, continue to press on, for through even the tiniest faith, the Lord can move the mountains…stay strong and keep on keeping on!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

In the Process

I know it has been an extremely long time since I’ve blogged. I wasn’t sure if I was going to continue to write on it after I came back from Mexico, but for my friends over there and the one’s here, I figured why not? Plus, I enjoy it because there are times when writing something out helps you get a better perspective then simply thinking about them over and over again. The other reason, which is the bigger of the two, is that coming back to the States has been rough…it has been quite a transition and growing period, that is still going on, but I figured, we all struggle, and God stretches us at different points, so why hide that when others can pray about it and know, yes, we all have our hurdles and times of confusion and pain, so what are we going to do? Keep following the Lord and truly trust Him completely or fall into self-pity and just go through the motions of living?

These past several months in the States, has really challenged my faith-how much do I really trust the Lord of my Salvation? It is easy to say, but do my actions really reflect that? Am I thanking Him through the periods of waiting? The periods where He seems to be completely silent? These are questions I have had to really reflect on. And yes, I do trust Him, but it has come to the point that I have to consciously beat the battle between my flesh and my spirit to carry out that trust in my actions. To have joy in the Lord and in who He is by doing my best with an attitude of gratitude bringing Him glory in whatever circumstances He leads me to.

The other main thing that I have been wrestling with, that God has gently but relentlessly been teaching me is true surrender. When God led me to Mexico, I had no problems; I was excited and even through the tough times, I immensely enjoyed it. Then when God called me back to the States, I was fine with it, but I was already imagining the “what” God wanted me to do. So when I came back, and my “whats” did not fall into place, I was discouraged, mad, confused…the list goes on. But as the months passed and nothing was panning out, I started to ask why is being back in the States so hard, why did God bring me back here? Especially as 2011 came to a close and a whole new year was beginning, I really was trying to see what could be different to have a better year and do better in all areas. That was when I really listened, the Holy Spirit showed me that the “whats” I never surrendered to Him. Sure I prayed about them, but I was holding them close to me, so for me to be completely surrendered, He had to pry them from me; however, if I held them with open hands then all He had to do was to pick them up, and I would not have experienced so much discouragement. So as you start out this new year, remember with your goals and plans, dream big, have goals, have plans, but hold them with open hands not clinched fists, keeping your eyes on the Lord, making His priority yours, so if He does decided to go in another direction, you will already be ready, truly surrendered.

And another piece of wisdom, even trials and lessons and periods of silence and desserts are blessings, for they bring us even closer to our Abba, as we learn that He is who and what we live for, in any and every circumstances, for this is not our home=)

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Goodbyes and Hellos

Today, started with one of my students saying, “Maestra, I won’t see you any more after today.” As the year has ended, I have six days until I return to the States. My heart is full of emotions. The comforting thing is after I spend the week saying goodbyes, I get to end it with hellos.

I have such peace and joy in knowing that though I’m leaving precious friends and lovable students, God is leading me for right now to the States. There is no where I’d rather be than in the middle of where God wants me to do. Whatever the future holds, it will be an amazing, not always easy but worth it, journey because I have such a faithful Lord. I cannot begin to even tell you everything He has taught me in my time in Mexico. I have shared some on past blogs, but He has stretched, grown, and molded me, and He is continuing to do that as He draws me closer to Himself, for He knows that I still have a far way to go.

As I said, this week is going to be a time of goodbyes. The teachers and students through me a surprise pizza party to say thanks and goodbye, and the youth group last night threw me a surprise goodbye party as well. I am leaving behind people whom I have grown to love, like Melissa and Montse, who are twins that come over at least once a week, the Guzmans, who have treated me like family, Gloria and Lili, some of the most wonderful co-workers I’ve had the privilege to not only work with but also become friends with. The list goes on….I leave though not empty because even if I can never come to even visit again, the cool part is we are still part of the family of God, and it’s such a sweet reminder that no matter where I am, not only can I pray for them but one day will get to see each other not for a little bit but for eternity. Leaving this time, reminds me of my first mission trip ever to Honduras, and when we were at the airport, our friend we made there, Alex, was dropping us off, and as he said bye, he told us, “See you in Heaven.” We of course were like, that’s so sad we probably won’t see you until then, but it’s bittersweet because though it might be true it’s still the hope we have in God. So as I say goodbye to amazing people who have impacted my life, I leave confidently knowing that the Lord is leading me.

And in six days, I get to see my fantastic family who have supported me with each step I have taken even if it leads me to a different country or not=) Not to mention, I will be able to see friends who have also supported, encouraged, and prayed for me. So for some it’s goodbye and for some it’s hello.

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Memorable Quotes and a Time for Celebration

I don't know if I was as excited for July 4th as I was today-my guess is because when you are in a different country, you are simply more patriotic. So how does one celebrate independence day when not in one's country-well, I decided to celebrate with my students. I made them hamburgers, potato salad, and ice cream sundaes (they liked the sundaes the best). It was so much fun=)

Since this is the last week of school-which is so hard to believe that a whole school year has past- I decided to share some of the things my students have said over the year. They have been such a joy to teach, and I'm going to miss them a lot! Enjoy the quotes=)
~Can we play one(uno) teacher?-all my kids
~Teacher, it's going to be sad in Heaven because you'll be speaking English.-Martha
~May I check water please?-Cristian (he wanted to say, May I drink water)
~Maestra, tu puedes hablar espanol perfectamente- Martha and Helly (Teacher, you can speak Spanish perfectly-they're exaggerating quite a bit...lol)
~Do you have a stick that you can hit people with like a pinata?-Helly asking my brother-in-law, David, who's a cop when they where interviewing him about his job
~Maestra, why do your eyes always change from green to brown to green again?-Helly
~Man, teacherman.-Danny, who used to think every profession ended with man like firemant
~Maestra, in the US, do you drink water from the sink? Yes. You drink dirty water!-Naomi and Cristian
~Maestra, it's difficult to teach you Spanish, and it's difficult to teach us English, right?-Danny
~Maestra, why do you have green eyes, and we just have brown eyes?-Helly
~Maestra, you're more Mexican than American now. Why? Because your skin is darker!-Helly
~Teach, teach, I need help!-Danny ("Teach" is short for teacher b/c here people can shorten most words-so Danny decided to apply that to English as well!)

God has blessed me and taught me so much-it has been such an adventure and privilege to teach my kids this year!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

It's Not About Understanding

If a man is going to do anything worthwhile, there are times when he has to risk everything on his leap, and in the spiritual domain, Jesus Christ demands that you risk everything you hold by common sense and leap into what He says, and immediately you do, you find that what He says fits on as solidly as common sense…Trust entirely in God, and when He brings you to the venture, see that you take it. We act like pagans in a crisis, only one out of a crowd is daring enough to take it. ~Oswald Chambers

Today marks 10 months since I’ve moved to Mexico, and God has taught me so much. I am humbled and in awe that He takes the time to patiently teach me and refine me even after I struggle so much. The past two and half months, God has been teaching me about trust. It’s easy for me to tell the Lord how much I trust Him when I know what I’m doing, when I’m comfortable, when I see what His plan, when I understand what’s happening. It’s when He takes it all away and asks, “Rhonda, do you trust me? Do you really trust me? Will you follow me no matter if you can’t see the reason, when you don’t see the end? Can you act on your words?”

I’m in a time in my life, where I don’t understand God’s purpose for asking me what He is asking me to do. I only know vaguely the where-I don’t know the why, the what, the how. And I’m not going to lie; it’s been hard not to understand. There are times where I’ve been angry, I’ve been discouraged, and I’ve just been tired all around. Yet I have the most amazing Abba; He has not given up on me. In fact, He gently takes me and teaches me. When I thought I couldn’t handle not knowing anything, He lovingly pointed me to scripture and people to remind me that it’s not about understanding but about trusting in who He is and His promises to me and the simple fact that when I accepted Him as a Savior, I gave Him my life, surrendering to do His will. This past week, I really grasped what Philippians 1:6 and 2:13 talk about-it’s true, God is still working in me according to His good pleasure. My sister reminded me that the Bible talks about the unimportance of understanding; it’s Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths.” I have a God who loves me above measure, whom I gave my life too…it’s His to use, I simply need to follow. Like the quote above, most of the things worth doing, takes risks…the risk for me: trust without understanding, yet is it that much a risk when I serve the God of gods, who has shown me the ultimate love? Does He deserve any less?

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Wait...What??

So, throughout my 9 months here, I have numerously said, "Wait, what?" Usually it pertains to them wanting me to do something that was totally outside my comfort zone, which yes, I know, that's ministry...lol. So, one would think that I would have learned that by now and just go with the flow; however, these past weeks, I think I have used this phrase almost every other day...okay, not that bad.

The first time was on cinco de mayo (which, it is celebrated more in the US than Mexico-ironic is it not?) Anyway, Elizabeth, the Guzman's daughter, came over to play some "board games"; however, it was an excuse for some of my friends, headed by these two 15 yr old twins, Melissa and Montse, who are amazing, to throw me a surprise birthday party with an American, chocolate, chocolate cake (Mexican cake is quite different) with M&Ms-yes, they know me well;) I'm just so blessed that the Lord provided me with some fantastic friends here, and though at times there is a language barrier, we are sisters in Christ and true friends, whom I will miss when I return to the States.

Then the next day, was a "Wait...what?" experience because in Mexico, they celebrate Kid's Day, to celebrated kids, on April 30th, but we were on Spring break, so we celebrated it May 6th. It was a lot of fun. We went to Pizza Hut, and the kids played on their playground, learned how the pizza made, and made their own personal pizzas. It was a fun and unique experience, especially when my kids asked me what we did in America for Kid's Day and watching their shocked faces when I told them that we don't have a Kid's Day in the States...it was priceless.

Another culture difference is Mother's Day here is always May 10th-so this year, I made sure my mom had two Mother's Day=) It was funny to be asked about it because on Sunday, I wrote on my mom's facebook to wish her a Happy Birthday, and they were like, Rhonda, Mother's Day isn't until Tuesday, and I said, "Not in the States", but we celebrated Mother's Day with a mini-program at the school. I taught my mothers a "Mexican Chip-Dip"-kind of ironic that I'm in Mexico teaching a "Mexican" recipe, and then my embarrassing, "Wait...what" moment, came when Mrs. Guzman made me speak Spanish in front of all the parents. Yes, I still get so embarrassed speaking Spanish in front of a lot of people-but I survived-God is so good=)

God is still teaching me so much about depending upon Him and waiting on Him. He is constant and is constantly pursuing His children. We simply need to sit at His feet and pursue Him, resting in Him and falling in love of Him-He truly is awesome-there are times I just stand in awe of His love and His desire He has to want a relationship with me-enjoy Him and your relationship with Him!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Contemplations

First, I must apologize-I just realized that I have not blogged in over two months. I have been busy, but I know that that is really not an excuse. My first college roomie, who is also a good friend, blogs and took a challenge to blog everyday for a month-so proud Amy=), though it makes me feel bad that I can't even blog once a week, but I will work on it-promise!!

Well, these past two weeks I have been on as they call it here "Semana Santa", which directly translated means, "Holy Week"-but we would consider it Spring Break. I'm not going to lie-April has probably been the hardest month so far-it was a busy month, and I just struggled a lot with various issues and spiritual warfare. But as I had these two weeks off, I thought back to when I was an RA, and the director, before our Christmas and Spring breaks, he would challenge us to think about it has "half-time" and "time-out" and reflect on the ministry we were doing on our halls. So thinking of that, I thought a lot about my New Year's Resolutions, how was I doing with those, as well as the goals I have as a teacher, and how I was with the most important aspect-my relationship with God. As I said, April has been an extremely challenging month, yet as I reflected back these four months and then to the almost 9 months I've been here, I can see how God is still at work, still at my side, even through the hard times. It doesn't matter if I struggle or if I grow discourage, what matters is that I remember to look to Him, my Refuge, my Strength, my Comforter. There is this amazing song called "Blessings" by Laura Story I heard today (the lyrics are below) that talked about how there are times God uses the low points in life at times, the pain, the confusion, the loneliness, the "whatever" to teach us, to bless us by molding us, to refining us-to be refined, we must go through fire-through pain to come out as a beautiful vessel to be used by the One who is worthy, the One who promises to be right there, by our side when we follow Him!!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Blessings-Laura Story
We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love is way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
We cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt your goodness, we doubt your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
As long as we have faith to believe

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not our home

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

The Little Things

This blog is just going to be about the little things that make me smile, even now thinking about them...some have to do with my students, others with my amazing co-workers, and lastly, about my amazing Abba=)

Last week, it all started when one of my girls asked, "Maestra, why do you have freckles?" So, I explained that my mom had a lot, so I have them as well. Then another of my students spoke up and said she thought it was because of the sun. I then further explained how if I am in the sun, I do get even more freckles. With that said, my kids immediately pulled me out into the sun and stared intently at my arm for like 5 minutes, though I kept telling them that it's a gradual thing, that it won't happen immediately (I think they were a little disappointed). It was really cute=)

Then today, one of my boys complained to me that no one wanted to play with him during recess, so I told him I'd play for him-though I admit, I just wanted to get some stuff done, but I knew this is what I should do. He wanted to play tag, so soon all of my kids were playing with us-and it was so much fun. They even thought that if they were holding onto my arm or held my arm, they would somehow escape from being tag from whomever was it at the moment. But I had a blast-it was such a highlight to the day!

Last week, the two teachers I work with invited me to go get tacos at this restaurant close by-and these teachers will bring me food to try or just help in anyway they can. It was just so much fun to hang out with them outside of school as they tried to explain the difference between all the different tacos-you would be surprised at all the different kinds. And it was amusing for them to say, "Rhonda, that has 'chile' in it, don't eat it-pica (it's spicy)!" They know me well...lol. But it was so much fun to relax with them.

For my final "little thing"- at, times I find it hard to simply rest in the Lord and wait in Him when I am faced with a lot of unknown and confusion. Yet on Sunday, a dear friend of my sent me a text telling me to read Psalm 94:17-19, 22- and these verses are all about the comfort of the Lord, even in times of confusion. And it just humbled me to think how faithful He is even when I am struggling-what love is that?? I'm going to end with just writing verses 19 and 22, " When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Thy consolations delight my soul...But the Lord has been my stronghold, And my God the rock of my refuge."

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

God Moments

God has totally wowed me this past week. And if you ask me what big thing He did-I couldn’t answer. It’s just the little blessings He’s done this week, when I wasn’t even looking for it-Honestly, God is just so awesome!!

Last Thursday, I went to this little convenient store across the street; the lady who owns it, Leite, is an older woman who is super sweet. For Christmas, I made her brownies and varies homemade cookies, and this past Thursday, I went in there to get something, and her daughter, I believe, asked me to come over on Friday and eat with them and asked me if I would teach her how to make brownies. I’m so excited because I’m not sure if they’re Christians or not, but I’ve been wanting to somehow reach out to people around me, but I wasn’t sure how because my Spanish isn’t the greatest, and it’s hard here to break past that. However, without even praying about it-which I should have-God provided this for me. So this Friday, I will be teaching her how to make brownies and get to know Leite and her family more=)

This past week at school, we had cultural week, where each day, Monday-Thursday we learned about a different culture. The kids loved it, and I love learning and researching different cultures, so it was a fun week. Then on Friday, the parents brought in food from the different countries. Usually, Mrs. Guzman brings in someone to do a special presentation for the parents and kids; however, this year, she couldn’t find someone. Therefore, the Kinder 1 teacher thought of this “great” idea that I should play the flute for them because one of the countries we studied about was Ireland. Needless to say, I was super nervous because at the wedding, I didn’t know anyone and at the quincenera , it was just people from the church, but this time it was my parents-in my mind a whole new level (I’m a wimp, I know), but I firmly believe that when God gives you an opportunity, in my case to play the flute, and someone asks you to use it for His glory, you should do it. Thanks be to God, I played well. That itself was a God-thing, but the other God moment, is that one of my students’ mom is learning to the play the flute. She came up to me afterward and asked me if I would allow her to come in the afternoon sometime and just play with me. I’m again really excited for this opportunity to get to know one of my parents more-such a blessing.

This past weekend proved to be another God-moment. I had to go to the border of Guatemala to get my VISA extended. So the Guzmans took me to a city that is about 30 min. from Guatemala. Dr. Guzman’s brother-in-law is friends with a man who used to work immigration, and I haven’t met either one of these men. Yet, they used their connections to not only stamp my passport without us actually having to go across the border, but they also got me 6 months here rather than the usual three, which works out perfectly-how awesome is God??? Also, the Guzman’s sister and brother-in-law and niece were so hospitable and nice; it was such a nice trip.

Lastly, the church gave me a box of staple items and two of my students from my Saturday English classes gave me some food. And I also started asking for prayer requests if any of my helpers have some, and I was able to pray for some of them, which was encouraging b/c sometimes, I feel like I can’t do that much because of the language barrier that I’m so nervous about, but as undeserving as I am, God still allowed me the privilege to pray for them! Then yesterday, I received a Christmas package from my mom, and the same day, I received a care-package from a dear friend, who is like my little sister=) Everyday there is always something to give thanks to God for…this past week though, He just awed me-it’s so humbling to receive blessings from the Lord-praise be to Him!!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Taking Advantage of Every Moment

Well, here I am, a few weeks short of having been here for 6 months-where did the time go? Last week, my kids were a little rambunctious to say the least. By Friday afternoon, if I were honest, I was ready for another Christmas break;) However, it is at those moments when I feel spiritually attack, and lies come that say, “I’m the worst teacher.” “I don’t have strength to go one; I am at the end of ideas” that when I come on my knees in front of my amazing God, that He uses the Holy Spirit to convict and comfort me-what a mighty, loving God we serve! While I was praying and feeling sorry for myself, the Holy Spirit reminded me that I was there to reach each kid in their own way, and it’s not about me at all. I had to ask myself, “Rhonda, how can you individually show the Lord to each of your students-reaching to the different needs.” And it was such a good time to refocus and think about which kids just needs support and love that they may not feel all the time, who needs encouragement that they are smart and can do it, or who needs someone to just understand that they are naturally energetic, and it’s not a bad thing, you just have to control it. So, I am now trying to be more intentional with my 6 main kids. I want to reflect the love of God in my every action and word to each of my kids. I am enjoying them so much, and they are so eager to learn, which means I need to take advantage of every moment I’m given with them to reflect Christ in my life, allowing the Holy Spirit to work through me and not try to do it on my own. So instead of looking at myself, may I look to the Author and Perfecter of my faith and allow Him to continue to transform me and give me wisdom as I minister to each of my kids.

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Still Learning...

Well, I am back at school from a nice, long Christmas break. We are now starting our second week, actually. My kids are doing pretty well. They remembered a lot of English which makes me excited!! In fact, one of my boys asked me the other day, “Teacher, how do you say octopus in Spanish I forgot?” And one of my girls asked the music teacher in English, “May I go to the bathroom?” And I must confess, I was quite excited=)

I did have a nice Christmas vacation. I got rest and just relaxed, while learning all sorts of new traditions here for Christmas, which I’ve already talked about some and for New Years. I spent New Year’s Eve with the youth pastor, his wife, and family-it is a lot bigger deal here than the States. You spend it with your extended family and eat a big meal, just like Christmas. There were of course fireworks, and they told me that there is a tradition that you eat 12 grapes, which signifies kind of like 12 wishes you have for that year, one grape for each months. New Year’s Resolutions aren’t as big here as they are in the States. Oh, and there is another fun tradition here-if you want to go on a trip in the New Year, when it’s 12, you’re suppose to walk around the block with a suitcase, but I will confess, I didn’t see anyone doing that, but that’s what I was told. The last culture thing I’ve recently learned is instead of the ides of March, they have the ides of January….five months and some, and I’m still learning=)

I am now in charge of the nursery in the church…which for those who know me well will find that funny. And my welcome gift was a baby who threw-up all over me…and I was ready to resign…lol. Just kidding. Actually, what helps motivate me is my older sister who has a hard time always being stuck taking care of her kids and not being able to enjoy worshipping the Lord-and it’s true that even mom’s need a break and have community with other believers and spend just time praising God, so I will hang in there through the thick and thin;)

I’ve been learning so much already this year, which I just thank God for. My future as of right now is unknown to me, and I was spending a lot of time stressing and worrying over it-because I really want to do whatever the Lord wants me to do and to be used of Him to the upmost capacity, whether that’s staying here, returning to the US, or going somewhere else. But this year (yes, I know it has only been 17 days so far) I really wanted to spend more dedicated, disciplined time in prayer and to just spend time with Him. I’m reading The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer, and in one of the chapters he talks about how we are so used to noise and activities in our lives, even now, writing this, I’m listening to music. And it is something I struggle with-just sitting under the Lord, as Romans talks about, and having quality time with Him through His Word and praying. But these past 17 days have been so awesome because I’m actually being disciplined and being intentional with my time with the Lord. And He’s been opening my eyes to so much and challenging me so much and filling me with peace, just like Philippians 4:6-7 promises He will. So my encouragement to all y’all, is each day, turn off the noise in your life, whatever form that is and get alone with God, really search His Word and spend time on your knees, seeking Him, imploring Him…and you won’t be disappointed!!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

The Reason

"Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus, who although He existed in the form of God, did not regard equality with God, a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men. And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross." -Phil 2. 5-8.

This was my first Christmas away from my family, and I'm not going to lie, it was a hard month in December, until finally the Holy Spirit was like, "Rhonda, stop feeling sorry for yourself and remember why you even celebrate Christmas." That made me stop and think-sure, I love my family, love the traditions my family has, and I simply love everything about Christmas, but the reason I'm even in Mexico right now is because Jesus came to the earth 2010 years ago to save me. As Philippians 2 says, Jesus humbled Himself, gave up His home, His right-hand seat in Heaven to come to save sinners like me. Due to His grace, He is using me right now in Mexico, so how dare I complain, when it is because of the "first Christmas", I am here, serving my Savior. He is the reason I'm here at all-so praise be to Him!

I know I haven't updated in awhile-between my students' Christmas program, the church's Christmas program, passing out blankets, celebrating Christmas with people here, I have barely had a moment, though I've loved it all!

My kids did an amazing job at their Christmas program...they sang English really well=) The first day we went to pass out the blankets at the juvenile detention home, we were only allowed to pass out food because early in the day a fight broke out, so no one could leave their cells. It was still a good time, and we sang songs as some of the women passed out the food. The Christmas cantata went smoothly as well; I helped with the props, and thankfully nothing big was missing=)

I did get to see how Mexico celebrates Christmas!! They celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve, eating around 10-10:30 at night, and I didn't get back to 2:30, though the missionaries did tell me that some people go until 5am. I got to taste their version of turkey, stuffing, punch, beef cooked in lime and not on the stove, and I got to through sparklers at 12am, another custom to welcome Christmas. It was fun to see how different but at the same time how similar it was to America. The missionaries and their family and friends accepted me to their Christmas celebration, that I am so thankful to God. Then on Christmas, the youth pastor's wife asked me to hang out with their family and extended family, and once again God proved how faithful He is in the little things. I did get to talk to my family, which was good, and then God allowed me to stay busy with other people, that Christmas was good even if I was away from my family. I had such a blessed and humbling Christmas-that once again made me remember to focus why I'm here on the earth-to glorify my Lord, who is so worthy! Thanks for all y'all's prayers and support! Have a wonderful day!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Traditions=)

I’m so sorry for not updating in two week…unacceptable I know. The first thing I must share is that of early this morning (3:20am) I became an aunt to now, two adorable nephews=)
My class is getting better each day, which is encouraging, thanks to the Lord. I can’t believe it’s almost Christmas. I made an advent calendar for my class, so each day we do something for Christmas. They absolutely love it. I did introduce stockings to them (I had to bring some American culture to them, right??) I’m glad they like Christmas because I love everything about Christmas, plus it helps me from being away from home. We have a Christmas program next Thursday, and I’m so proud of all my classes learning some Christmas Carols in English, and they have so much fun with it.

Talking about traditions, I invited a few friends over to decorate sugar cookies, which I had to make from scratch-and I didn’t ruin them!! They had a lot of fun, and they were so creative, a lot more than I was. It was such a fun, good time. I’m so thankful that the Lord gave me the boldness to actually ask people to come over...it was such a good night!

On Monday, the teens and some people from the church and I are going to be passing out blankets to the teens in the juvenile detention home as well as food for Christmas. I’m excited, and I ask that y’all pray that these teens will feel the love of God and be receptive to the Gospel. For the season is about the gift Jesus gave to the world when He came to the earth, and hopefully these teens will accept Christ. So please continue to pray for this ministry that I have the amazing privilege of participating in.

As for the lessons I’m learning, I am waiting on the Lord for some things, and I have to confess that I’m not a patient person, so it’s been really challenging to simply rest in the Lord and wait for His direction and answer. But on Wednesday night, the pastor spoke on Lamentations 3:22 and how we should remember how God’s compassion never fails, even in those periods when we are waiting. When I got home, I read the verses following, and verse 25 says, “The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him.” It was just so reassuring to remember that He will show me in His time because He is faithful and will fulfill His promises. So, I simply need to remember exactly who God is, whom I serve. Isn’t He so awesome??!!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

In Everything...

Well, I officially spent my first “real” holiday in a different country…and since it was Thanksgiving, this blog is going to be all about giving thanks to my faithful friend, comforter, Savior, and Lord. Oh, and don’t worry, I still had a very American Thanksgiving, other than the fact of working and being away with family. I taught all my kids about the history of Thanksgiving, introduced them to pumpkin pie, and Charlie Brown’s Thanksgiving, and we even made a turkey, whose feathers were made up of all we were thankful for (that’s what the picture is) =)

First I want to say that I’m so thankful to the Lord for His faithfulness and strength. I know I’ve said this before in my blogs and probably/hopefully will continue to say it-God has taught me so much in my 3 ½ months I’ve been here in Mexico. And He is constantly giving me the strength to do things which on my own, I would never have done and been able to serve Him not of myself of Him.

Second, I want to thank the Lord for my amazing family, my second family here in Mexico (the Guzman’s-who provided a real Thanksgiving meal and invited me over to share it), my friends, both in the states and here -I can’t count the times where each one of them have offered me encouragement and prayers, which I’m indebted to (including y’all). As for my family, our skype dates and simple love even when we are not in the same country have been priceless, and I love every minute we can talk and catch up.

Third, I’m thankful for my rambunctious class-though at times they can be exasperating, I love them all so much. I can always count on them to make me smile and laugh-I love it! So though, it wasn’t easy not being able to spend Thanksgiving with my family and not really being able to talk to them yesterday, I’m blessed beyond measure, and I am content and just filled with thanksgiving-in everything, may I give thanks, which is the will of God in Christ Jesus (1 Thes. 5:18) What are y’all thankful for???

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Not About Me

I'm sorry I didn't post yesterday-I forgot about it until last night at 11, and by then I was really tired and knew I couldn't write anything that made sense-I know I'm only 23, but for those who know me can vouch when I say, I don't make a lot of sense late at night (11 is late for me) especially when I'm tired.

However, better late than never=) My kids are doing better-they still have their ups and downs, but they are fun to teach. I got to talk to one of my kids about salvation, and he accepted the Lord a couple weeks ago during chapel. It's so exciting and a relief to know that your students have accepted Christ as their Savior!! Also, yesterday, one of my students asked me for if he could play tag while waiting for his mom (but it's against the rules of the school), so I said no, but thanks for asking in English; I'm so proud. His response was: so, does that mean I can do it? I couldn't help but laugh a little because he was so cute with his reasoning if he asks something in English, I will be more likely to say yes...you have to love my kids!

Last Saturday I played my flute in a wedding. It was my first time ever playing for a wedding. Dr. Guzman asked me the Wednesday before, and at first, I though he was joking, but he wasn't, and since I can't say no, I played (I didn't even know the bride) It went pretty well, and it was cool to see a wedding in a different country-it was a lot different from ours in America...from lassos to gold coins to the never-ending bouquet toss (which I got a free mini wedding veil)...it was fun and interesting!

Today, I went to the juvenile detention home, where I gave my testimony-yes, in Spanish-and yes, I was asked to- and yes I was so nervous...now it may seem weird to some of y'all to think that I had no problem speaking to 50-70 girls every Tuesday when I was a Liberty no to mention the fact that I've given my testimony several times in my life...so what's the big deal? But all of that was in English; it's really nerve-wracking to give my testimony in Spanish. Though, thanks to Mrs. Guzman, it was understandable because she read over it and corrected my many errors. So hopefully the Lord used it to encourage some of the teens there-and they were really nice and patient with my accented Spanish=)

Between the wedding and the testimony and reading Acts 20:24, 26-27, the Holy Spirit convicted me again. I was so nervous playing my flute for the wedding and giving my testimony...to be honest, I wanted to back out of both of them. My testimony was two-fold, I was allowing Satan to put doubts in sharing my testimony by thinking, "I haven't faced anything like these guys in the detention home have by the grace of God; how could my testimony help at all?" as well as the fact that I was nervous speaking Spanish in front of like 20 people, just like I was nervous playing my flute. Then when I read Acts 20:24, 26-27, Paul didn't count his life as dear to him but was willing to do whatever for the furtherance of the Gospel and to help others in their faith-he took advantage of every opportunity, so that when he left Ephesus heading to Jerusalem, knowing he was going to die, he confidently said that he was innocent of any man's blood because he boldly shared the Word with everyone. And here I was being Moses making excuse after excuse why I couldn't do it, when the Holy Spirit told me, "Rhonda, since when is this about you? Since when do you belittle your testimony? Your testimony isn't even about you but about the grace you've received and how God has worked in your life. Playing your flute isn't about impressing people but about bringing glory to God Almighty. All of it is about God, so you need to be a willing vessel and stop thinking it's about you." And you know, that's exactly what I was doing...I was underestimating the power of the Holy Spirit and not being willing to be available to the opportunities God gave me...because I put the focus on me and not on whom it should be on...God-may God always be my focus and may I always remember it's not about me at all but about Him and His glory!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

God Things

I can’t believe it’s Friday already, though I must confess, it’s nice to have a three day weekend (it’s a holiday on Monday-yes!) Today, my 4 and 5 year olds threw me a surprise party to say thank you for teaching them English (that is all of them in the picture) It was so sweet and encouraging. My 1st and 2nd graders have been somewhat of a challenge week, simply because they are just being so mean to each other. Please pray that they will just learn to show love to each other. God has really taught me a lot through teaching them though. Love is not an easy thing, and you hear all the time that love is a choice, and it takes work. Well, seeing how easy it is for me to respond without patience to my students when they don’t want to listen or to see them react to each other when someone calls them a name, it really just opens my eyes of what love truly is. I choose to respond in love with patience or I choose to be snappy with them and respond in impatience-it’s my choice, am I going to choose to love or not to-in your mind it sounds so simple, doesn’t it? But in reality, choosing to love is hard. And the more I see what love truly is and the work it takes, the more humbled I am at God’s love, and I am just in awe of Him and the love He demonstrated for me. I tell my kids that if God could love us, we should have no problem loving each other, which more and more, I’m seeing how true that is. I’ve been in church all my life and accepted Christ as my Savior when I was 4, but the older I am and seeing how challenging having patience can be or seeing my kids just not getting along, the more I see how amazing the love of God is and how much we have to love others!

Another God-thing in my life is how God really is our strength and comfort when we let Him. This past week, there have been ups and downs, but God has been so awesome. For example, on Sunday, I just felt really alone, and on Sunday night, no joke, the sermon was about when you are alone, you are not really alone because God is right there beside you-He is giving you strength, He is your constant, He is faithful. Then this week, with my kids acting up, I was getting pretty discouraged, and there are still times when I just wish I knew Spanish completely, yet once again through my devotions, talking to my amazing brother and friends, and reading the story of Amy Carmichael, God just encouraged me and strengthened me. He used these tools just to remind me that I am not alone in my struggles nor I am I alone in my blessings. It’s just so humbling that when we are willing to continue on, not because of ourselves (because He knows how weak I am) and we want to hear from Him, He is faithful-we just need to be still and know that He is God!!

Please continue to pray for me-I believe that God has sustained me through your prayers as well! Enjoy your weekend and next week!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Three Months Later...Spanglish

I know that today is Sunday, but I decided to wait until today because I have as of today, been here for three months, so I wait until today and write. How fast these three months have flown by-at times, I wake up still not believing that I’m actually living in Mexico. Other days, I feel like I have been here forever (until I find myself not being able to say exactly what I want to say in Spanish…lol). These three months have been filled with so many blessings, lessons, and countless first.

As for the firsts (I’ll just cover this week or this blog will become a novel)-I got to see the Pacific Ocean for the first time on Monday=) It was so warm, and I was able to see the sun start to set across the ocean. While I was there, I tried octopus for the first time; it was chewy but good; I also saw sharks (at least that is what those around me said) in the ocean. I experienced my first bonfire without s’mores (they don’t have graham crackers) on Monday as well-there was a bonfire/all-nighter with the youth group, which was a lot of fun. I also (for the first time) taught a couple of the girls from the youth group how to make crepes and chocolate chip cookies-soon, they want to learn how to make brownies-I think they think Americans only eat dessert, what can I say? But for those who know me, you’re probably shocked that they asked me to teach them how to cook-I was pretty speechless, but God works miracles, and so far, I haven’t ruined anything I’ve cooked!!

My kids are still doing well. I’m teaching them a couple of songs for the Christmas program coming up, and one of my kids asked me to teach them a Halloween song (remember, he is asking this on November 3rd), so unfortunately, I had to crush his desire by not only telling him Halloween is past but that we don’t have songs for Halloween-I think he’ll be okay. In seriousness, my kids are a blast and are slowly getting into the swing of things and starting to get along…though please continue to pray for them.

I find myself more and more speaking Spanglish; there are times where I’m talking to the Guzmans in English, and randomly, I say a word in Spanish instead of English. And there are times where I’m talking in Spanish and say a word in English (even when I know the Spanish equivalent)-I’m not sure if this is a good sign or a sign that I’m losing both language and soon won’t be able to converse at all…hopefully it’s the sign I’m slowly becoming bilingual. The youth pastor and the teens find it a blast to use the English they know, so yesterday, the five of us that went to the juvenile detention home spoke a mixture of Spanglish-it was pretty funny-and I think Spanglish should be an official language!

During my three months here, God has taught me so much and has really taught me how to be dependent on Him and to wait on Him. I don’t know what the future holds, but it’s okay. God calls us to live day by day, walking in His Spirit. I know He will lead me, and while He is being silent about the future, He is telling me to live today to the fullest, bringing Him the glory by serving Him with my whole heart day to day, leaning on His strength and not to be paralyzed by excuses but being confident in Him.

Lastly, I want to thank all y’all for y’all’s prayers-they have meant so much to me, and I ask y’all to continue to pray for me!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

One by One

Well, another week has past by; time seems to be flying by. As they say, “Time flies when you’re having fun.” This blog is going to be somewhat different due to simply the fact that God has been showing me the ways in which He has come through and blessed me-so this blog is mainly simply giving thanks and sharing the blessings He’s given me since being here in Mexico.

But first, as always, I’ll share what’s been happening with my little ones=) Today, I learned how to make tomales at the school-however, I will save it for the real Mexicans and just enjoy eating them-it’s too hard! They are so fun; yes, to be honest, they can be a challenge, but I really do enjoy them so much. One of the teachers at the school, who also has a child in my class, was telling Mrs. Guzman that she hears my kids among themselves using Spanglish-which encourages me because it means they are learning. They are really funny-they still think that if they use English then they will get what they want, and if I say no to something or have them wait because I’m helping someone else, that means I just don’t listen to them or understand them (this is when they are talking in Spanish) I’ve notice that I’m still a people-pleaser, yes, even to 1st and 2nd graders-though, thankfully, I can say no when I have to, but I really hate to and hate having to give them demerits…sad, I know.

Oh, and I will share one more amusing story before the blessings start (though it was not so amusing when it was happening, at least to me, though everyone else thought it was quite hilarious) Last night, I went on visitation, and at one of the houses, they served pumpkin-yes, I did have real, legit pumpkin-don’t ask me how they cook it, but it was really good. Anyway, I ate a piece, and someone asked me if I wanted more, and I was full, so I said no thank you. And they were all asking, “You didn’t like it.” And I answered, “No, me gusta, pero estoy llena” (which of course in my English-speaking mind was No, I like it, but I’m full.” However, it is a good thing that I like body language because of course I was using my hands but also shaking my head saying, “Yes, I liked it.” And as I was answering, everyone started laughing , like 10 people. And I was so confused until one of the girls, Yazmin said, “Rhonda, you just said you didn’t like it; you need to say No, si, me gusta”-I will conquer this language someday-hopefully;)

As I mentioned earlier, God has really opened my eyes to see the many blessings He has provided. Earlier this week, I was sitting in a taxi, thinking about my sisters and brother, missing them so much, and all of sudden, the Holy Spirit was working in me, reminding me of all the blessings He’s done for me since being here. For instance, the Guzmans and their daughter, Elizabeth have been so welcoming, always giving me advice and being my Spanish-English dictionaries and just opening their home to me. The youth pastor and his wife have invited me to different ministries and always make sure I’m invited to every activity and making sure I understand what’s going on. God has given me six adorable (at least most of the time) students with great co-workers. God has been teaching me so much, and His Word has been so alive and such a comfort. I haven’t ruined anything when I’ve cooked-for those who know me, you know this is a God-thing! I’ve had friends who check-in on me and still allow me to keep up with them to in the states. God has allowed me to hang out with people here and has pushed me out of my comfort zone to really learn more and more Spanish and participating in things I really enjoy…the list goes on and on; I just need to remember as 1 Thes. 5:18 says, “In everything, give thanks, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” There are times, like in the taxi, I just wanted to feel sorry for myself, yet the Holy Spirit allowed me to see past my circumstances to see how amazing He’s truly been. So just like the hymn says, I will strive more and more each day to, “Count my blessings, name them one by one!”

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

Underestimating

First, I must apologe for not writing last Friday. There was a ACE (the curriculum the school uses) Conference in Mexico City (which is where the picture was taken), that I went to with Mrs. Guzman and two other teachers. Let's just say it was a 14 hour, overnight bus ride for a two day trip. Needless to say, it was quite long, and I learned that I cannot sleep on a bus, but on the bright side I got to eat Papa Johns=) and I am now more sure of how the curriculum should work, and it re-energized me and encouraged me as to what I was doing: pouring into my kids, whom I love more each day!

Teaching is going well. I really enjoy it the more I do it-my kids are learning so much and are using English more and more-which is encouraging. They are also so eager to please and do a good job-I just love them!

I didn't have my English class last Saturday because I didn't get back from Mexico City until 9am, and I only got around 7 hours of sleep in three days, which might not sound bad, but I'm just not as young as I used to be...lol...but everyone seemed to understand. I can't wait to see them tomorrow. I did get to hang out with one of the people who attends the English class last Tuesday. She is a couple years older than me, and it was so nice to be able to just hang out and talk. She is so sweet, and I'm thankful for this new friend God has given to me. And yes, we talked in Spanish for like three hours-she was so patient with me=)

The juvenile detention home is such a blessing to be involved in as well as visitation. God is stretching me a lot through these ministries. He is also allowing me the opportunity to do what I love: discipleship and simply talking about His Word. Two Saturdays ago, I was able to go disciple this one teenage boy named Jesus. He accepted Christ about a month ago when we came, and it was such a blessing to be able to explain to him more in depth about the decision he made and talk about the new life he now has in Christ-so please pray that he will continue to grow and be in the Word, and his hunger that he has will never go away.

God is still teaching me so much, which I'm very thankful for. I have realized living here how much I underestimate the Lord. There have been countless times where I simply tell the Lord that I can't really talk to people or I can't really share His Word with people because I'm not fluent in Spanish or I don't want to make His Word unclear for someone or I'm too nervous or I'm just not good talking with people I don't know. I just give excuse after excuse, yet God pretty much forces me into situations where I have to talk, where I need to share the Word where people, and literally everyone else is talking to other people, so I'm the only one to do it. And every time, He has come through. He has given me the words I've needed, giving me the references I've needed, and allowed the other person to understand. It's so humbling because here I am, faithless Rhonda, being like Moses and making excuses, yet God is again showing me that it is not about me, and He is not daunted by my weakness, in fact it's through my weaknesses, He is most glorified because no one can give me praise because they all know my Spanish isn't perfect. Therefore, if I was able to do it, it was only through God, so praise be to the Lord and not me-so, just as Paul said, I will rejoice in my weakness so that God will be glorified. So next time you're tempted to tell the Lord you can't for various reasons, remember that He used Moses, who was full of excuses, to lead a nation, and He is using me, who still struggles with underestimating His power and what He can do with a willing, earthen vessel!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda

A Clearer Picture

It's hard to believe that I've been living in Mexico for two months. When I stop to think about it, I can hardly fathom it. It has been one of the most challenging, stretching yet rewarding two months of my life, and I'm excited to see what will happen in the following months to come.

My kids are a blast. They surprise me with how much English they are catching on to. Now, there are somethings I will explain in English, thinking they won't understand if I use some English, yet they respond by giving me the English equilavent of what I said-I'm so proud of them. They are also learning how to read and spell in Spanish and English-and they are doing a great job, though I must say it's ironic to me when they ask me how to spell words in Spanish. I must say that I'm thankful that I had good Spanish teachers (though, I should have studied more), and I'm thankful that Spanish is a language where you simply have to sound out the word to spell it-it's been a lifesaver. Oh, and it does help that they are only in first and second grade, so I know the words they want to spell...lol. I am enjoying my kids, and the more I am around them, the more I have a desire for them to accept Christ as their Savior and really grow in Him. I asked one of my kids what his favorite day is during the school week, and he answered Thursday because of chapel-I just pray that all my kids will grow to know the Lord and be excited about learning about the Lord.

Last Friday night, I got a surprise babysitting job of two girls in the church. It was fun though; I taught them Skipbo, which they thoroughly enjoyed. After that, the youth pastor, his wife, and one of their daughters visited me. It was so encouraging. They encouraged me so much through the Word and their words. And I must say, I made coffee for them-everyone should be very proud!! My class at the church is also going well. They are doing really well too, and they are just so friendly. I'm thankful for them. The youth pastor started small groups at the juvenile detention home for the teens who have accepted Christ. It's a privilege to be a part of discipling new believers and teaching them the Word of God. The youth pastor paired us up, so there are two people teaching, and I'm still really nervous to talk Spanish, I must confess, but the guy I'm paired up with makes me talk, which is good. But please pray that the Holy Spirit will use ministry He has given us there to build these teens up and that they will continue to grow in their relationship with the Lord. Visitation is going well too. It's cool to see people's hearts for the Lord and to share the Word with others; it's hard to explain, but the joy the Lord gives when you are sharing the Word and encouraging someone in Christ-it's amazing. Last night, I was forced to talk-but the Holy Spirit was so faithful, and He gave me the words in Spanish to say=) and according to the person I was talking to, they understood me-praise the Lord!! I'm so thankful for the Lord for those opportunities because it's something I loved to do, and yet again, I've made God too small, thinking because I am not totally fluent how could I really share the Word or what's on my heart, yet God put this ministry in front of me and surrounded me with people who push me, which has been such a God-thing and a blessing-I'm so thankful to the Lord.

As I've mentioned earlier before, God has stretched me so much since being here, teaching me a lot and drawing me closer to Him. God is teaching me to really rely fully on Him and seek Him out more and more. God is just wanting me to pursue Him and really grow more intimate with Him right now instead of relying on people. I can see God's wisdom in it all. For example, it is good that not a lot of people know English well because it forces me to speak the language more and reach out more. Also not having my close friends or family a phone call way, I feel like God is saying, Rhonda, I want this time with you, and this way you have less distractions and less people to talk to, so talk to me, share with me-so it's good just at time a little hard...it's definitely been a stretching couple of months, but at the same time, it's so cool b/c I have seen God is such awesome ways work in the little things-it's like I'm away from the normal distractions I had while I was at home or at school and am placed outside my comfort zone that I'm aware of God moving, even in the little things-so it's been so good and so challenging at the same time that I wouldn't trade it. I'm so thankful for the clearer picture God has given me of Himself and in ways He moves. I love Him so much more, and I pray that I continue to love more and more with each passing day! Thanks again for y'all's prayers!

Because of Christ,
Rhonda